Tuesday, September 8, 2009

MTV

I got a haircut today and my stylist is just a year or two younger than me, very pretty, and extremely chatty. She reminds me a little bit of Zooey Deschanel without the extreme apathy. She has a strange addiction to MTV and all of its programming that I haven't watched since Freshman year of college when I secretly longed to be on the Real World, Seattle. However, she also has an affinity for the newer shows that I wouldn't watch if you offered me all the carbs on the planet. In one 30 minute trim, she touched on about 800 shows, including but not limited to:
  • The Real World (Miami, Boston, Seattle, Las Vegas...)
  • Singled Out
  • The Jenny McCarthy Show
  • My So Called Life
  • Next
  • Total Request Live
  • Laguna Beach
  • The Hills
  • Pimp My Ride
  • Beavis and Butthead
  • America's Best Dance Crew
  • The Osbournes
  • MTV Spring Break
  • 16 and Pregnant
  • Room Raiders
  • The Tom Green Show
  • Punk'd
  • Sweet 16
  • Road Rules
  • Daria
  • Pop-Up Video
  • ...and anything hosted by Chris Hardwick
My reason for posting all the shows she named is with the hope that it makes your head turn to the side a little bit and say, "Oooh yeah! I remember that show," the way that I did as she described her life events using MTV programs in place of adjectives. It's also to let you know the titles of a few of the newer shows, just so you can see the terrible turn MTV's programming has taken.
Yep. 16 and Pregnant is a show.
I'm pretty sure I'm going to turn into my mother when I have kids. They will not be allowed to see MTV until they're 17 at the earliest, and when they do see it, they will immediately be given some form of birth control and a copy of the Lord's Prayer.

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